September 17, 2015

Playing With Fire,True Without Defense

The truth needs no defense. It stands on its own. 'So let the horses run free.'

    Moment Of Surrender
by U2

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I tied myself with wire
To let the horses run free
Playing with the fire
Until the fire played with me

The stone was semi-precious
We were barely conscious
Two souls too cool to be
In the realm of certainty
Even on our wedding day

We set ourselves on fire
Oh God, do not deny her
It's not if I believe in love
But if love believes in me
Oh, believe in me

At the moment of surrender
I folded to my knees
I did not notice the passers-by
And they did not notice me

I've been in every black hole
At the altar of the dark star
My body's now a begging bowl
That's begging to get back, begging to get back
To my heart
To the rhythm of my soul
To the rhythm of my unconsciousness
To the rhythm that yearns
To be released from control

I was punching in the numbers at the ATM machine
I could see in the reflection
A face staring back at me
At the moment of surrender
Of vision over visibility
I did not notice the passers-by
And they did not notice me

I was speeding on the subway
Through the stations of the cross
Every eye looking every other way
Counting down 'til the Pentecost*

At the moment of surrender
Of vision of over visibility
I did not notice the passers-by
And they did not notice me

It is so ever present, so ignored, so irksome. It is the truth. We hear much, little and nothing at all about it; we learn that 'the truth will set you free.' Some of us know about the unpleasantness of the truth. We have been spiked upon its points. Uncomfortably reminded, goaded, compelled to return to the truth, to the center.

Why must it bring itself into our presence,
why must we attend to it at all? For some of us, we choose not, and we just don't. Preferring our imagined mental states, many times we withdraw, disassociate, as if there were multiples of our self; retreating into our minds where we can call the shots without any other regard. It seems so much better that way at times.
Our personality seems so much the weaker when confronted with the truths that the world turns on and will continue to press. We so often fool ourselves into this lonely, alone state. There seems no other good options.

Truth asks and often demands primarily two thing
s of us always, at all times. First it asks for acceptance, but not agreement. Simple acceptance will do; then it asks for what is greater and far more difficult: truth asks that we surrender to a place, a state, a grace that is much more than we are alone. It asks for and offers love. Here we play with fire; it is as thrilling as it is terrifying. To let the horses run free, believing in something greater, something we cannot see. We 'the begging bowl,' the surrender back to the heart of each and every matter because at the end of our time, the world will continue turning. Its spin will go on, 'to the rhythm of its soul, visibility over invisibility.' Our job here? Say yes. Say yes and accept.


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