Home Again

Lovesong

by The Cure

Listen Here

Whenever I'm alone with you 

You make me feel like I am home again 

Whenever I'm alone with you 

You make me feel like I am whole again 

Whenever I'm alone with you 

You make me feel like I am young again 

Whenever I'm alone with you 

You make me feel like I am fun again 

However far away I will always love you 

However long I stay I will always love you 

Whatever words I say I will always love you 

I will always love you 

Whenever I'm alone with you 

You make me feel like I am free again 

Whenever I'm alone with you 

You make me feel like I am clean again 

However far away I will always love you 

However long I stay I will always love you 

Whatever words I say I will always love you 

I will always love you

Waking up to something both inside and outside. More than simple knowledge, it is knowledge by experience, "when I am with you..."  singing mostly about what is forgiveness and what is love: "I feel clean again, I will always love you."

 It reminds me that in its own quiet, almost forlorn way, the lyric gives rise to hope, hope of newness and joyfulness. Ultimately this song sticks out in my mind for its expression of faith: I will always love you. And there it is--love. Those qualities the Christ talked about, love your neighbor as your self : with faith, hope and love, I am listening.

"Wherever you hear his voice, harden not your hearts."

Blessed Are Peacemakers; They Will Inherit the Earth

The Reason

by Hoobastank

Listen Here

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go

That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday

And all the pain I put you through
I wish I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear

And the reason is you
I'm not a perfect person

I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

If we want to be true peacemakers, the most vital and intimate peacemaking begins with each of us as individuals within the human family. We cannot support anti-war movements and turn around to attack our neighbor who happens to support another political candidate.
We forgive our selves first and most importantly for our own failings, "I'm not a perfect person," as the lyric records. None of us are. We are not required to be-- to be effective peacemakers.

What is required is that we give evidence of courage and a braveness to forge forward, that we take what is our own and that we own it. Just own it--it is after all  your very own creation, the failing that you have made, "I wish I could take it all away...be the one who catches all your tears." 
You can catch your own tears and do the hard work to "find a reason to show." Even if that reason isn't your first try, or your first thought. Blessed are the Peacemakers, they will inherit the earth.
Peacemaking, forgiveness is powerful, personally and to the world we live in. Let it begin to change you.

My Joy

My Joy

by Depeche Mode

Listen Here

My joy, the air that I breathe

My joy, in God I believe

You move me

My joy, the blood in my veins

My joy, flows in your name

You move me

I'm not a mountain, no

You move me

My joy, heavenly bliss

My joy, the pleasure I miss

You move me

I'm not a mountain, no

You move me

The bible instructs and gives many clues as to the nature of joy and love. We are at all times to be  mindful of the 'great commandment,' love one another. Here in the gospel of John is one such instruction:

The bishop-teacher to the chosen Lady and to her children whom I love in truth--and not only I but also all who know the truth-- because of the truth that dwells in us and will be with us forever.
Grace, mercy, and peace will be with us from God the Father and from Jesus Christ, the Father's Son, in truth and love.

"But now, Lady, I ask you, not as though I were writing a new commandment but the one we have had from the beginning: let us love one another.
For this is love, that we walk according to his commandments; this is the commandment, as you heard from the beginning, in which you should walk.
Many deceivers have gone out into the world, those who do not acknowledge Jesus Christ as coming in the flesh; such is the deceitful one and the anti-christ.

Look to yourselves that you do not lose what we worked for but may receive a full recompense.
Anyone who is so "progressive" as not to remain in the teaching of the Christ does not have God; whoever remains in the teaching has the Father and the Son.

If anyone comes to you and does not bring this doctrine, do not receive him in your house or even greet him; for whoever greets him shares in his evil works. Although I have much to write to you, I do not intend to use paper and ink.
Instead, I hope to visit you and to speak face to face so that our joy may be complete."　　2Ｊohn1
　

The Breath of Dawn

no confessions

I loved you before I knew your name
The first time I saw you
What be your name
Earnestly I wished to know

your voice like music
speaking first shyly
and then, later
slyly
softly humming a tune
bright

Eyes, liquid darkness
passing over me

like the sun, your smile
shines
kisses on my face
Sweetly, the moon
regards the sun
brilliant

lights
obscure lights
illumine

a touch
takes hold
time unfolds

days go by
all remains
All Rights Reserved 2008

Some thoughts about confession. Many hear confession and think law, think church, think oh-no. For some time the title of this poem did not click with me. I found the words and the meaning of the poem not consonant with its title. Seems like a "confession," but no, it's not. I recently read in Flannigan's book about transformations. She discusses the difference between apology and confession. The big difference according to her is that a confession is disclosure of something previously secret that another party would not or could not have had any knowledge of prior to disclosure. Makes sense.

On the other hand, an apology is acknowledgment of some 'no, not-good'  that both parties are aware of which directly affects their ongoing interactions. Love isn't a secret when both parties are in on it. This poem is not an apology nor a confession. When we approach the confessional in some church, the intent there is to bring light into our darker spaces, to open up breathing room, to free ourselves from the dark, deep burdens we carry, and to replace those weights with a new sense of self, and a renewed connection to the Spirit and the Creator. That's a confession, and it has a place in love, the breath of dawn.

Hitting the Skids

In some places the skids means to be in an unenviable place, as in one step forward, two steps backward. Does it have to be like that? Does that one step back place one on the skids, like a hamster on a wheel? The unenviable turning of the wheel, why?--when just recently there seemed to have come a place of calm, a peaceable and livable state where we might all prosper. Ouch!  People generally don't like what they don't know, what they don't understand or half-understand. Even if there is not direct, immediate conflict between individuals, then there is conflict elsewhere. And where dignity is lacking, respect is absent too.

That brings conflict to you and me. (We're Only Human After All) I've seen this picture before... and suddenly the new made good is punctured by those around who would be the critics. And what the hell am I talking about, you ask? Well, in the short of it, it's about that much used term dignity. Many like that term; they like what it means. The UN likes that term; they use it as part of their human rights doctrine. Do they extend themselves to others?

The Church uses that term too. She really likes that term; matter of fact, she likes it so well, she teaches it every day. Hmm. The dignity of a human person is what primarily distinguishes it from others. All are deserving of their dignity. The sidebar of this blog even has it on there-- affirm the force and value of a person. Each deserves respect...respect them in the place they are... so as to create a more unified and harmonious world. Some of this may require patience. And yes, it works, this more harmonious world. And very well when we all sing the same song. Does that make sense? Can we talk?

Diane Rizzetto writes in her book, Waking Up To What You Do, a story about a Peace Corps worker in the chapter, Taking Only What is  Freely Given:  After pedaling miles and miles with a passenger upon his bicycle in rural Africa on a very hot day, they arrived at her destination. He had gone out of his way to take her. "He was exhausted. I was giddy and in awe of him." It was, she says, an act of dana, giving freely and generously. It is not the simple act of giving help, writes Rizzetto.
Instead practicing dana over time teaches openness; this can be profound in working our way through to a more open heart, a heart that sees past anger, jealousy, fear or rejection.

 The woman on the bike recounts that looking back to that day, moments before the man offered her a ride on his bike, she felt stranded. But still a part of her was calm because she knew where she was in that place, and then the stranger came and offered her his help. She accepted in the spirit of dana. We can learn.
John, the disciple of the Christ writes:

See what love the Father has bestowed on us

that we may be called the children of God.

Yet so we are.

The reason the world does not know us

is that it did not know him.

1John3:1-2

The Light, the Spirit

The light come down upon me. 
Some times in life we are surprised by the most magnificent gifts of the Spirit. The Holy Spirit is mysterious in gift giving. Once some years ago, I went to learn how to cook. Not long after arriving in that place for the first time, I saw someone who made me intensely curious. I could hardly keep from staring. Earnestly I wished to speak, to know their name. They smiled. A small bit of conversation followed.

This person left and I did not know their name, yet more than any other, I wished to see them again!
That some how we found ourselves placed together in the same kitchen, proves to be a wonder, even now.
Because sometimes cooking together is very messy, and sometimes things burn; other times the food is tasty and we are so glad. There are days that the sight of the kitchen is terrifying! Without courage to experiment, at times we turn away; it just seems so hot in there. Boiling water, burnt fingers, we imagine our self unappreciated.

But what was happening here? Mostly good. It came to me over time, that this person simply is a gift. An amazing gift to me by the Holy Spirit. How else could it be?  How could I refuse such a gift. While not perfect, we are very lovable. This proves a great help to me. It's my hope I am mostly a help in return, if a clumsy one. And like all gifts, those freely given and freely received, may be freely withdrawn. It's the 'free will' thing. The Spirit does not force anything; it can be surrendered.

This gift given me, cannot be shamed. Some may not understand; some may be jealous, but owing to the Original Giver, we cannot be shamed. Truly we are innocents.
The light of the Spirit is all knowing and I have, often in extreme anxiety, followed its lead, honoring  and respecting what I cannot always know or understand.
But one thing I have always discerned is the gift of love, sometimes soft, sometimes tough. I could not have had instances of more beauty and wonder in my life without such great gifts as these. The Bible tells a bit about the gifts of the Spirit, about the light to the world. Keep your courage, engage patience when in darkness, follow the light in your life, as did the disciple John.

"All Good Gifts"

by Godspell

Listen Here

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.
He was in the beginning with God. All things came to be through him, and without him
nothing came to be.
What came to be through him was life, and this life was the light of the human race;
the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.
A man named John was sent from God."
--the disciple, John1:1-6

Come to the Water, Light to the Nations

The Servant Song
composed by Richard Gillard
Listen Here

Brother, sister let me serve you.
Let me be as Christ to you.

Pray that I might have the grace
To let you be my servant, too.

We are pilgrims on a journey.
We are brothers on the road.

We are here to help each other
Walk the mile and bear the load.

I will hold the Christ-light for you
In the night time of your fear.

I will hold my hand out to you;
Speak the peace you long to hear.

I will weep when you are weeping.

When you laugh, I’ll laugh with you.
I will share your joy and sorrow
Till we’ve seen this journey through.

When we sing to God in heaven,
We shall find such harmony
Born of all we’ve known together
Of Christ’s love and agony.

Brother, sister let me serve you.
Let me be as Christ to you.
Pray that I might have the grace
To let you be my servant, too.

At this season, after the feast of Christmas, there comes in the Gospel story of John, the baptism of the Lord. And through this story we learn several important things about the infant who grows to become the Christ. First, we learn that the 'lamb of G-d' is then not a warrior, that in baptism the child is filled with the Holy Spirit of God, that the child is the divine creation of G-d. In baptism, the child is both interiorly and externally announced as a creature with a life in the Spirit. While many faith communities today find it fit to argue and debate endlessly, to schism and separate from others over the nature, timing and significance of baptism, both the Orthodox and Catholic Christian communities see fit to follow both the Torah and the later Christian gospels for guidance on the matter, choosing to christen or name a child before the Lord in its early days, after birth.

In the Book of Isaiah 49-52, there are the four passages about the "Suffering Servant" in which a servant whose identity is unclear, yet this One is to be chosen by the Lord for a particular service. He is not merely to restore the people to a faith, but to moreover be the sign of God's presence in the world. Thus over millennia, the Servant has come to represent both individuals and whole communities in faith. We are called then to be the light of the nations.

In baptism then, one is called in the Holy Spirit to a life of light. The baptized then live in the light, for help to all, to bear the load, to share in community the gifts which the Spirit then brings. Many are baptized as tiny infants with the faith of their parents, a constant light; others come to the waters of baptism as adults to signify that while they may have once seen only darkness, now they see light. Guided by established members of the faith community, the baptism is their exterior announcement, that they, the light of the world, have been made anew, given life by the Holy Spirit. For them, their eyes shine brightly; peace and joy is their heart.

Blessed Are the Peacemakers

Listen Here

music and lyrics

by Hoobastank

If we want to be true peacemakers, the most vital and intimate peacemaking begins with each of us as individuals within the human family. We cannot support anti-war movements and turn around to attack our neighbor who happens to support another political candidate, for example. We forgive our selves first and most importantly for our own failings, I'm not personally perfect. None of us are. We are not required to be-- to be effective peacemakers.

What is required is that we give evidence of courage and a braveness to forge forward, that we take what is our own and that we own it. Just own it--it is after all your very own creation, the failing that you have made, I wish I could take it all away...be the one... You can catch your own tears and do the hard work to find a reason to live, to exist. Even if that reason isn't your first try, or your first thought. Blessed are the Peacemakers, they will inherit the earth. Peacemaking, forgiveness is powerful, personally and to the world we live in. Let it begin to change you.

Mysteries and Mystics

A Song for You

by Karen Carpenter

Listen Here

I’ve been so many places in my life and time
I’ve sung a lot of songs I’ve made some bad rhyme
I’ve acted out my love in stages
With ten thousand people watching
But we’re alone now and I’m singing this song for you

I know your image of me is what I hope to be
I’ve treated you unkindly but darlin’ can’t you see
There’s no one more important to me
Darlin’ can’t you please see through me
Cause we’re alone now and I’m singing this song for you

you taught me precious secrets of the truth withholding nothing
You came out in front and I was hiding
But now I’m so much better and if my words don’t come together
Listen to the melody cause my love is in there hiding

I love you in a place where there’s no space or time
I love you for in my life you are a friend of mine
And when my life is over remember when we were together
We were alone and I was singing this song for you.

Often people talk about mysteries and mystics. Many do; I have too, but what about that? The singer, Karen Carpenter sings this beautiful song, all the more so because of her tragic struggle with mental illness.

She suffered from an eating disorder so severe, her life ended through self-starvation at the age of 33.

That in itself is a mystery; why does it seem, some are made to suffer and others prosper? What mysterious force in the universe sets this course; why could she not go another way? The lyric is passionate, elegant, insightful. She is aware that "precious secrets of the truth withholding nothing...I love you in a place where there is no space or time...listen to the melody... in there hiding." 

The artist speaks volumes. She sings; the author of all creation invites us to join in to sing this song. It is, as the mystic says, something of a mystery, felt but not seen. "Darling can't you please see through me?" Many of us ask for faith; we ask for hope. The Psalmist of old intoned, "Great is the Lord, and worthy of high praise; God's grandeur is beyond understanding."

-- Psalm 145- 3