Do You Hate Me?

"I'm with you until the end of time."  Matthew 28:20

     
The Flame

by Cheap Trick
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Sometimes the things we mean to communicate and what we actually do are not the same. Our interactions with others may be muddied by our own personal feelings and by prior experiences with any given individual. Then there is the issue of relational 'history,' or the old habits making changes or deviations seem difficult if not impossible. So when we talk to our friends and loved ones, misunderstandings and disappointments are inevitable. Resentments may boil and we often feel sudden flashes of
intense emotion, hatred even.

A good hypothesis here may be that the one feeling the hatred towards another is  projecting his or her feelings or attributes onto that other person, maybe some guilt or over- aggressiveness; however the deepest truth here may be that the hurt and twisted   angry feelings are small when viewed from the lens of self hatred now being projected onto our partners, loved one or friend.

Our impulse, like that of a child who has just been criticized about a small misdeed by a parent, is to become emotional, upset, angry, to take the superior position. So then we don't have to feel the regard of another, to 'protect' ourselves from feeling anything at all.

 The truth is, you may not be as horrid as you think; maybe someone did do something upsetting--do you now hate me? I already feel awful disappointing you; rather than getting mad and criticizing me, can you tell me in a more positive way?

Matthew 28:20

Hold On, My Heart

Hold On My Heart

By Genesis. 1991
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Hold on, my heart
Just hold on to that feeling

Hold on, my heart
Just hold on to that feeling
We both know we've been here before
We both know what can happen

Hold on, my heart
'cause I'm looking over you shoulder
Please don't rush in this time
Don't show her how you feel

Hold on, my heart
Throw me a lifeline
I'll keep a place for you
Somewhere deep inside
Hold on, my heart

Please tell her to be patient
'Cause there has never been a time
That I wanted something more
If I can recall this feeling
And I know there's a chance
Oh I will be there
Yes I will be there
Be there for you

Whenever you want me to
Whenever you call I will be there
Yes I will be there
We both know we've been here before
We both know what can happen

Hold on my heart
'cause I'm looking over you shoulder
Please don't rush in this time
Don't show her how you feel

Hold on, my heart
Throw me a lifeline
I'll keep a place for you
Somewhere deep inside

Hold on, my heart
Please tell her to be patient
'Cause there has never been a time
That I wanted something more

If I can recall this feeling
And I know there's a chance
Oh I will be there
Yes I will be there

Be there for you
Whenever you want me to
Whenever you call I will be there

Yes I will be there...

The teaching is that the Christ will return, the shepherd collecting his flock. He realizes the importance of the devotion of the disciples and wants them to know he will be with them, to the end of time; however there is risk. The risk that they may not be loyal, they may not remain faithful to the One, the All, who makes the sun and the moon, the very heart of all the Christ has come to share. Yet he assures all that he, the Christ will remain until the end of time. -- St. Matthew 28:20

Tell her to be patient, the world is not yet ready, the place held open for all to enter is a deep, profound mystery. The Spirit makes a place for one and all. Hold on, my heart. I'll be there.

Ways of Sincerity, More Than One

   UPSTREAM COLOR --2013

Author and theologian Thomas Merton wrote about a facet of human nature which he calls fears of the truth. And there are several. In particular, he addresses the meaning of sincerity in every day life.
While much in our lives is motivated by our fears, Merton notes that "sincerity is a simplicity of spirit which is preserved by the will to be true. It implies an obligation to manifest the truth and to defend it... Sincerity in the fullest sense is a divine gift."
He notes that it takes more "courage than we imagine to be perfectly simple with other men... False sincerity has much to say because it is afraid. Yet true candor cannot be silent. It does not need to face an impending attack. Anything... may be defended with perfect simplicity."

In the end, by Merton's reckoning, sincerity is really an issue of love. The sincere one is one who seeks the truth and embodies it. Truth then is not just an abstraction. It is real, living flesh, like yours and mine.
Many in today's world fear that they are not really lovable, not lovable to the extent they think they deserve. And others fear that a lack of real, meaningful love in our lives indicates that "since we are not lovable as we are, we must be lovable under false pretenses, making ourself appear to be different that we are."

In the conclusion to his essay, No Man Is An Island, Merton writes that so few believe in God because they do not believe that even a god can love them. The man who will admit that what he sees may be wrong with him, and recognizes that he may be, still, the object of God's love precisely because of his shortcomings can make a start to become sincere. His love is based then upon confidence rather than the falseness of illusion.

The film Upstream Color examines the lives of two deeply imperfect, and in some ways, flawed individuals. While much is remarked upon the film's abstraction, the central characters meet, develop and share an intense love for one another that becomes based in sincerity.
She suffers from a serious mental illness and he, from a professional shortcoming that results in the loss of the licensing required to carry out his profession. Initially she offers up certain details of her illness, while he initially withholds facts about his own situation.

The resulting social stigma he bears from past indiscretions and the stigma of her illness, combine to create a powerful portrait of two people picking their way through the world, salvaging and in a measure, redeeming themselves, and each other through sincere love.
The simplicity of the film is provided by the many scenes of nature and the interactions with that nature. The film maker leaves us with a certain ambiguity in those scenes, to believe or not. The effect is both spiritually powerful and insightful.

The Challenge

'No one comes to the Father except though me'--John 14:6

Come To the Water

by John Foley, S.J.

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Let all who thirst,

let them come to the water.

And let all who have nothing,

let them come to the Lord...

And let all who seek,

let them come to the water.

And let all who have nothing,

let them come to the Lord...

And let all who toil,

let them come to the water.

And let all who are weary,

let them come to the Lord...

And let all the poor,

let them come to the water,

Bring the ones who are laden,

bring them all to the Lord:

bring the children without might.

Easy the load and light:

come to the Lord.

While initially the bible verse, 'no one comes to the Father except though me' John 14:6; John 35-37 may be perplexing, daunting or even received with open doubt-- it may be also regarded as a stop sign for some; recalling the general commandment of the Lord God 'to love your neighbor as yourself,' then its significance becomes more clear.

The Christ wishes to make it known that the commandment to love isn't talk, it isn't a pretty phrase; instead it is the teaching to all growing in faith; faith is given in measures by the One Lord, by God the Creator of all. The Christ is saying that if you earnestly follow the teachings, follow the commandments, then you too will like me, ascend to paradise.

Even so many with rational, scientific minds will question, will doubt or reject this saying out of hand. Is this the only way? No. Is it the Christian way? Yes.
May the peace and grace of God's love for mankind be with you and yours. Always. Amen.

Liking and Knowing

Vision of Love

1990-- by Mariah Carey

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Treated me kind, sweet destiny

Carried me through desperation to the one
that was waiting for me

You took so long, still I believed

Somehow the one that I needed would find me eventually

Somehow the one that I needed would find me eventually

I had a vision of love and it was all that you've given to me

I had a vision of love

And it was all that you've given to me

Prayed through the nights, felt so alone

Suffered from alienation, carried the weight on my own

Had to be strong, so I believed

And now I know I've succeeded in finding
the place I conceived
I've realized a dream

And I visualized the love that came to be

Feel so alive, I'm so thankful that I've received

The answer that heaven has sent down to me
You treated me kind, sweet destiny

And I'll be eternally grateful, holding you so close to me

Prayed through the nights, so faithfully

Knowing the one that I needed
would find me eventually...

"Every person is indescribably complex, and so to speak, an uneven good."  --Karol Wojtyla, later John Paul II

Liking a person is very closely connected with knowledge, "who you turned out to be...," records the lyrics. The base of attraction is an impression, a disposition to regard the other as a value; it is the developed commitment to think of that person as a certain good. Such commitment can only be enacted by the will.
 'I want,' is implicit in 'I like.' Thus the will is committed by attraction, and attraction commits the will. This may be difficult to grasp intellectually; yet the song Vision of Love  makes this point emotionally, poignantly.

"Every person is indescribably complex, and so to speak, an uneven good," writes theologian Wojtyla. "Man and woman alike are by nature bodily and spiritual beings; they are such a being, seen by one another; in this way, each attracts the other.
All the potential goods or values that a given person may respond to derive from the object of this attraction. Each, then, attracts the other. For example, in y's attraction to x, the value most strongly in evidence is one which y finds in x, and to which y reacts most strongly."This one could say is the visioning, the imaging that the lyrics here speak to.

Also there's fact that y is particularly sensitive to it, particularly quick to perceive and respond to it. The mind, the thinking process, therefore plays a part in attraction, combined together with the emotions, such that a potent guide emerges in the mix as an important feature, strikingly evident in attraction.
"But this fact creates a certain internal difficulty in the sexual lives of persons. This difficulty is inherent in the relationship of experience to truth." Feelings often arise spontaneously. Where feelings are functioning naturally, they are unconcerned about truth. This is lust.
Truth for a man is a task of both his experience and his reason. This is why in any attraction, especially one of a sexual nature, the question of the truth about the person towards whom attraction is felt for, is so important.

Often people "generally believe that love can largely be reduced to a question of genuineness of feelings; although this is impossible to completely deny, we must still insist, if we are concerned about the quality of the attraction and the love of which it is part, that the truth about the person who is its object, play a part at least as important as the truth of the sentiment.'

"These two truths, properly integrated, give to an attraction [wholeness], the elements of a genuinely good, and genuinely cultivated love. Thus the object of attraction is seen whole, as a good, as a thing of beauty.
A human being is beautiful and may be revealed as beautiful to another human being." Love is a commitment to the good of each other. "For power is made perfect in weakness."
--2 Corinthians12:9-10